Shopping Tips and Guidance by Mandy Claire

Welcome to "The Gods Are Bored!" When choosing a deity to worship, keep in mind the way you dress. Some deities like for you to gussy up a bit. Others will take you as you came into the world. Personally I like deities who choose comfort over style. It's just how I roll.

During prom season last spring, Heir, Spare and I were treated horribly in a local dress emporium called Jan's Boutique. It was the busy season, and we went in the store, and a saleslady took one look at us and steered us straight to the cheapest gowns, saying, "I don't think you want to spend $3,000 on a dress, right? Unless maybe you do." (The last said in a very condescending manner.)

This is nothing to the story going viral right now out of dear old New Jersey. A clueless salon in Somer's Point canceled the sale of a bridal dress when they discovered that the purchaser had crossed out "groom" on the application and wrote "partner" instead. In a voice message on a phone, the store owner told the bride-to-be that the store wouldn't participate in anything "illegal," and what the bride was trying to do was "illegal."

I've heard of laws in my time, folks, but have you ever heard of a law against purchasing a bridal gown?

Anyway, the lesbian bride-to-be went ballistic, since she really loved the dress she tried on in the shop. She contacted the Philadelphia Daily News, and now the sad tale has gone viral.

Here's the pathetic, whimpering damage control offered up by the beleaguered shop owner:

http://philadelphia.cbslocal.com/2011/08/19/somers-point-bridal-shop-owner-denies-anti-lesbian-claim/#respond

The owner certainly got cussed out, and rightly so, but it wasn't during the try-on. It was after the spurned customer got the telephone message that her custom not only was not wanted, but also it was "illegal."

What is it with these people in high-end dress shops? Can they afford to be discriminatory and insulting in their selling practices? If so, why am I teaching school? Their businesses must be booming! If they can turn customers down, or steer them to shoddy merchandise, without thought of profit, they must be comfortable indeed.

We at "The Gods Are Bored" hereby designate Here Comes the Bride, of Somers Point, NJ "moron store of the month." Feel free to let them know what you think.

The only hope this sorry establishment has of staying in business is to relocate. Saudi Arabia springs to mind.