Shopping Tips and Guidance by Mandy Claire

Welcome to "The Gods Are Bored!" Must one be insane to start shooting at people in a crowded place? I think so. But it's funny how some of these insane people show so much doggone method. When a madman shoots a Congresswoman smack in the face, and kills an innocent child for good measure, some of us are tempted to search for a motive beyond mental illness. Completely crazy people open fire on shoppers at a mall, not at members of Congress who have been criticized by right wing politicians and commentators. (And completely insane people often miss their targets. They're almost never fatally accurate.)

I could go on and on about this, but I'll just compare Sarah Palin to Charlie Manson and leave it at that. Hey, I can be extremist too! This is my little corner of the First Amendment right here ... I can say what I want.

 Lighter fare now: On Christmas Day in the morning, we discovered a little house wren flitting about inside our dwelling. Since then, we've had five more wren visits. This morning, it being about 25 degrees outside with a stiff wind and three inches of snow, I was loathe to send outside another little wren hiding in the Christmas tree.

I called the local wildlife refuge, and they told me what to do. Consider this another bit of free advice from Annie the Cailleach!

In cold weather, house wrens will gain entry to a home through any little cavity. Then they can't get out again. So if you see a wren flitting from the living room curtains to the dining room settee, just open a window. Doesn't matter how cold it is, or how snowy. Wrens don't migrate, so they know how to deal with winter weather.

That's what the nice gal at the wildlife refuge told me when I said I didn't want to let the lil' fella out into the elements.

This has proven a terrific blow to my cats, Alpha and Beta, who see these little wrens as winter entertainment.

Free advice and First Amendment rights, all in one place! I really should charge for my services.