Shopping Tips and Guidance by Mandy Claire

I would seriously like to talk to these people who want to schedule a 12-month school year.

People, come and spend a day with me.

It's September 1. The students have not yet returned to school. I am spending these final days preparing my classroom and my lessons.

The part of the school where my room is located was built in 1926.

My room faces east. The view consists of an asphalt parking lot and the next wing of the school, which is made of yellow brick.

There is no air conditioning, and the windows only open six inches.

Today one of the guidance counselors brought in a thermometer. It was 97 degrees at noon in my classroom.

Here in New Guinea .... oooops, I mean New Jersey ... we've had eight heat waves this summer. We define a heat wave as five consecutive days with temperatures of 90 or better.

I cannot imagine trying to teach anyone anything in such conditions. I literally staggered to my car this afternoon. The idea of "quality instructional time" during the summer months does not take into account the age of the school buildings and the weather from region to region.

So, to the next bonehead who pipes up that kids forget stuff over the summer months, I say, well, yeah. But they wouldn't learn it in the first place baking in a 97 degree oven, so everything equals out.

I love my job, but sheesh. Someone pull the plug on summer, already! Oh pleeeeeeeEEEEEEEeeeeze!


Addendum to tonight's rant: The Onion's take on a busy god: http://www.theonion.com/articles/judge-orders-god-to-break-up-into-smaller-deities,404/